NOT DEAD! WANT SOME MORE GAY PIRATES?

The "B" is for "Book" and the "F" is for "Fuckin' 'ell, a book!"All right, all right, I haven't been the most faithful correspondent of late.  I won't blame you if you assumed that that I was gone for good.  I just hope that you envisioned a suitable end for me.  Stranded on the planet Mercury, maybe, or eaten by a venomous slugbeast thing.  Or maybe you figured that I finally made one too many bad jokes about Her Majesty the Queen, and was mauled to death by her attack corgis.

But in actual fact, I've been on a secret mission of the utmost importance.  I'm not allowed to reveal any details- suffice it to say, someone very evil is down to his last Horcrux.  (We're pretty sure it's his toupee.)

But have I been writing, in my off hours, when I haven't been fighting back against the forces of Twitter-based fascism, or being bent over a desk by Her Majesty the Queen and told what a very bad lawyer I've been?  Or have I aged and seasoned, like...well, not like wine, but maybe like cheese, and decided that there are more productive ways to spend my time than writing many many words about gay pirates?

HA HA HA of course not.  No, my disease is worse than ever, and my doctors have despaired of a cure.  Beggar's Flip, the sequel to Shell Game, will be out this summer, published by the spiffy folks over at Bedazzled Ink Press.  This is the continuing story of Darren- socially awkward noblewoman turned pirate queen- and Lynn- sorta kinda Darren's slave girl, sorta kinda Darren's life coach, and altogether the bossiest backstreet driver that ever set foot on a pirate ship.  The gay is radioactive, the snark is weapons-grade, and pretty much I do not know what I am doing with my life.  But I hope that you like it. 

And now, back to the workshop of the magical lesbian dwarf blacksmith who is forging me a double-headed axe blade out of the heart of a very gay star.  One more Horcrux to go.